Pastoral Ministry
Azusa Pacific University
Dr. Dick Pritchard
April 15, 2004
"Confirmation & Funerals"

I.   Confirmation/Affiliation
A.   Words about blessings, privileges and commitments in God's kingdom
B.   Words about belief
C.   Declaration of faith
D.   Commitment to belong/affiliate
E.   Receiving by church community
F.   Personal words of acceptance
G.   Sometimes personal information is shared
1.   Just give a little nugget of info
2.   It helps build comfortable connections
H.   Formal words of acceptance
I.   Prayer
II.   Spiritual Values in a Christian Funeral
A.   Addressing social, psychological, and spiritual needs to participants
B.   Allowing grief & loss rather than denying them
C.   Facing the reality of death
D.   Allowing valid expressions of feelings
E.   Allowing community to support the bereaved
F.   Making a place for great affirmation of faith
III.   Funeral
A.   Gathering statements about tribute, memory loss and comfort
B.   Read John 14:1-3, 11:25-26
C.   Invocation
D.   Hymns/special songs
E.   Biography/Eulogies
F.   Scripture
1.   1Pet 1:3-9
2.   Mt 5:3-4, 6, 8
3.   Psalms 27:3-5, 11, 13-14
4.   Psalms 46:1-6, 10-11
G.   Message/Sermon
H.   Hymn
I.   Closing Prayer
J.   Graveside
1.   Job 19:25-27
2.   1Corinth 15:51-52, 54-58
3.   Revelation 14:13
K.   Committal statement and prayer: He 13:20-21
IV.   Five Pivotal Priestly Moments in Life
A.   Birth - miracle of life
B.   Baptism - coming to faith
C.   Confirmation/Affiliation - looking for community
D.   Marriage Covenant
E.   Death into Eternity
V.   Traditional Maxims for Effective Pastoral Counsel
A.   Do no harm (especially sexual, but not limit to sex)
B.   Respect parishioners' rights and responsibility to choose their own spiritual guide
C.   Allow people time to arrive at long-awaited moments of insight
D.   Don't assume quiet listening or active confirmation are obligatory responses
E.   View spiritual formation as long-term
F.   View pastoral caring in a community context
VI.   Counseling concerns with opposite sex
A.   Transference: when the congregant begins to project feelings and desires into the counseling relationship that belong elsewhere
B.   Counter-transference: when the pastor begins to respond to the congregant with inappropriate feelings of affection noted by numerous danger signals
C.   Kieferd's steps regarding inappropriate relationships
1.   Notice you like working w/them
2.   Look for ways to work w/them more
3.   Being to think why you like them
4.   Begin to compare them to a spouse
5.   Someone usually says out-loud, "I am not sure why, but I feel attracted to you"