Christian Values in Human Sexuality
Azusa Pacific University
Dr. Steve Gerali
January 18, 2005
"Myths of Sexuality (Sex Myths)"

I.   Myth #1 – People are well informed about sexuality
II.   Myth #2 – Good sex requires intercourse and/or orgasm
A.   Sex is not an act, sex is a process
1.   There are sex acts, but sex by definition is not an act
2.   It starts as early as "glances" and attraction and moves through sexual self-concept, behaviors, thoughts, values, emotions, anatomy and physiology, interpersonal relationships, and diversity and moves through the physical acts of sexuality are carried through – all of this is sex
3.   The "how far is too far" question buys into this myth – because it is all sexual
4.   What needs to be developed is a theology of sexuality that encompasses sex as a process – not an act
B.   Since the brain is the primary sex organ, sex is learned
1.   Human sexuality is the only sexuality that is learned, where sex can be changed, made more creative, etc...
2.   Hence the "Honeymoon Letdown"
III.   Myth #3 – Women secretly want to be raped
A.   This myth grows out of the fact that we do not know how to discern desire
IV.   Myth #4 – Men are more sexually aroused by sight
A.   The man is more easily and quickly aroused than a woman through sensual experiences
B.   Term: Vassal congest
1.   Erectile tissue – any tissue in the body that can be engorged by blood
2.   Embarrassed is an "arousal act" due to the fact that blood fills erectile tissue in the cheeks
V.   Myth #5 – Sex therapy is kinky and involves immoral practices
VI.   Myth #6 – Certain positions during intercourse can guarantee the gender of a child
VII.   Myth #7 – Adolescents can't get pregnant the first time they have intercourse
A.   Menarche – First time a woman experiences her period – this is not the same as the first time of ovulation (it could have ovulated before and not had a period, or vice versa)
B.   There are times in which guys only ejaculate semen, however, it only takes one sperm, so it is hard to say for sure
VIII.   Myth #8 – People can't get pregnant if they have intercourse in a hot tub
A.   Sperm is effected at 102"F – of which would take a long time in a hot tub in order to get a body temperature higher than 102"
B.   From a youth pastor perspective, this is one of the most common myths you'll run into
IX.   Myth #9 – When you are married, you will have sex every night...
A.   When you have regularly what you couldn't have before, you need it less
B.   It becomes a natural part of your life
C.   Typically, the man is the first to deny sex in a relationship because it is related to the physical state he is in (i.e. if he is tired), where as newlywed women associate being sexual with being desired (due to culture pressures)
D.   Since sex is learned, sex is planned
E.   The worst time to have sex is when you have children between 2-18
X.   Myth #9b – When you are married, you will have sex every night five or sex times
A.   Women can have sex more than a man because after 2 or 3 times he can't get it up
B.   Sex is work – there will be times in a relationship that sex will be more work than it is pleasure
XI.   Myth #10 – Men reach a sexual "peak" at 18, women at 25; then it's downhill from there
A.   The truth: humans are the only species that can be sexual until death
B.   What does sexual peaking mean: at around 18-22 the "hormonal circuit breaker" is blown to cap off physical growth, and explains why all of the sudden college aged students get insanely horny
C.   This is not to say that sexuality desire goes down by any means as the chemicals subside
D.   God is not robbing anyone of anything – sexuality is not expected to only be experienced between 18-22
XII.   Myth #11 – Masturbation can cause disease, physical handicaps and various forms of mental illness
XIII.   Myth #12 – You should have sex with a potential mate with a potential mate to see if you are "sexually" compatible
A.   Truth of the matter, you can have sex with anyone of the opposite sex that you desire
B.   Sex has to be learned, thus, you are compatible with anyone
C.   First bouts of impotence happens in the 20s – sustained impotence happens when there are problems with infertility because it is sex on demand, thus creating pressure to be able to perform like a "monkey"
D.   There really isn't anything as sexual incompatibility
XIV.   Myth #13 – If you take Human Sexuality you will be robber of the mystery of sex
XV.   Myth #14 – Sex is not the glue in a marriage
A.   Good sex "` good marriage – you can have good sex in a bad marriage and bad sex in a good marriage
B.   Sex involves work