Tonight I was moving some current financial records from my "active" filing box to my "archive" filing box and I came across some old letters I had saved. There were some from my dad, some from professors in college, and a few others I had saved along the way. But one was from my Grandpa shortly before his death.

I thought I had remembered this letter with great detail.

I remembered the paragraph that is redacted (which will not be elaborated on publicly), and I remember the paragraph about the U-boat and WW2.

Strangely I did not remember the paragraph about my Uncle, nor the paragraph about my Grandfather's regrets, nor the paragraph about the, then recent, ex-girlfriend whom he had met the previous spring when we went skiing in Colorado.

I pulled out the type-writer paper from the flax stationary envelope and began to read...




He died a month later.

My Grandfather meant a lot to me. I always felt that out of my two parents, and four grandparents, my mother's father always understood me the best. He always treated me like I was an adult, even when I was 7 years old.

One of the most vivid memories I have of my Grandpa was shortly after my dad left. We were in my home's living room and amongst tears - which I later found out that very few people have ever seen him cry - talking about our family's current situation. He looked at me and said, "Andy, you need to be the man of the house now. Your mom needs your help."

I was 14.

It is something my mom to this day can't believe he said. But it is a moment I will remember forever.

His death came 3 years later, almost to the day, of that afternoon in the living room. It was odd for me. I don't remember being all that sad - even though he meant the world to me.

I was in hotel at 14th and Spring Street in Midtown Atlanta of all places (at that time I lived in Indiana) at a journalism conference with some fellow classmates. I flew to the funeral in Denver. I remember not crying during the whole trip. I found this odd, but I didn't force it. I then flew back to Indiana on Thanksgiving by myself.

As I have gotten older I have had moments where I wished he was still around. Moments where I feel he would get what I was dealing with better than anyone. Moments where I wish I could shoot ideas and offers and decisions off of him.

So tonight I sat at my desk up in my loft and I took a moment while everyone else watched The Bachelor and read his note again from from almost nine years ago.

I remembered what a great man he was.

And I cried a little...