Andy Borgmann's Blog

Justin thinks I have horrible taste in movies. This is mostly true. It isn't that I don't like good movies, it is that I like all movies.¹ I have seen exactly 643 movies in my life.² Out of those, I have disliked only 3.³ By definition this means that I like bad movies, vis-a-vis Justin is correct.

But if I had to list my three favorite movies they would be the following: In Good Company (I relate), The Bourne Trilogy (I am pretty sure I would sleep with Jason Bourne if he asked me to), and Hannibal. And don't even say Silence of the Lambs is better than Hannibal. To casually mention Dane Cook, if you even say Silence of the Lambs is better than Hannibal, I will stab you in the jaw.

Reasons Hannibal is better than Silence of the Lambs:

• Julianne Moore is way more attractive and less annoying than Jodi Foster
• Much of it takes place in Italy
• Plot focuses on Hannibal. Who gives a crap about Buffalo Bill
• Someone (tastefully?) eats their own brain

I could go on, but I won't.

One of the most essential scenes in Hannibal is where Lecter wonders if Agent Starling's parents are both "deep rollers." Take a look.

I don't know why, but as I laid awake past 3 am for the second night in a row mulling over the complexities of the universe, and even though I haven't seen this movie in over three years, this scene came to my mind while in the darkness.

It's probably because, like Starling, I too wonder whether or not my parents were both deep rollers.

This is no fault to them. It really has nothing to do with them. But I think the fundamental question Lecter was asking of Starling, and I am asking of myself, is valid. Is balance possible for us? Or is the passion, intensity, and drive hardwired to erase balance? Because with out balance - with out at least some "shallow" - I imagine one eventually hits the ground and that can't be pretty.

My mind drifts to a show we did a while ago about new research that says our happiness "range" is genetic. We can do little things to effect our happiness, but it is mostly predetermined. I am not sure I buy that, but I think Lecter would.

This got me thinking how fulfillment and balance are related? It seems the people I know that are the fullest are ones who have balance. Balance in love. Balance of power. Balance with family. Balance towards work.

I know many "deep rollers" whose parents were obviously a shallow/deep mix. These are truly great people. These are people to lookup to. They have a drive and passion for life that is respectable, but the balance in family and love and downtime that is missing in a deep/deep mix. Hopefully I can be like these people more as time goes on, or else I fear the next thing in store is a giant splat!