On Thursday, May 12, 2005 I started my first job out of college at Mount Pisgah United Methodist Church around 8:00 am. On Sunday, September 30, 2007 I left my first job out of college at the same job around 3:45 pm. I left with many lessons learned, many friends, many successes to be proud of, a few failures to be ashamed of, and a huge smile on my face.

When I first moved to Atlanta from Los Angeles, I found myself listening to a Dido CD my brother had left in my car that previous December. Dido will forever bring me back to May of 2005. This morning, as I drove to my last day of my first job, I shuffled the iPod over to Dido to take me back. I found myself listening to Life For Rent.

As I walked out of Mount Pisgah some 9 hours later and hopped in my car, I found myself smiling. But not smiling all real like we do in photos. It was that half smile. That smile you see at the end of movies where the main character is headed off for something fun, something great, something exhilarating, with a sunset, and music is playing in the background. I think if I were in a movie, the song playing in the background would be Life for Rent.

What I love about this song is that it tells of a story where one realizes their life doesn't belong to them. The songwriter realizes that since their life doesn't belong to them, this should have a profound impact on their decisions. And in classic Robert Frost style, realizing that my life is for rent has made all the difference.

My life doesn't belong to me, it belongs to God. Sounds cheesy enough, but it is true. This lifespan, while short, is only a glimpse of eternity. This is profound because it both speaks to the urgency of life and at the same time the meaninglessness of life. I think it is this realization that allows for Solomon to lament in Ecclesiastics about the meaningless of life but at the same time have him write in Song of Solomon about the fullness and passion found in life.

As I enter into a little of the unknown, I take solace in a God who has watched over me for years and has directed my paths better than I could have ever imagined. It is scary, exciting, overwhelming, fun, and most of all full. And that is what I have realized; first at APU, and now as I leave Mount Pisgah. I will take a full life that doesn't belong to me but belongs to my Creator any day over a life I own but comes up empty.

PS - Yes I know I look super cheesy in the photo. I took this photo of myself on my first day of work. I had no friends. I knew no one. I didn't even have a bed. I will always love this photo.