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This past weekend I went and saw the movie Knocked Up. I love the term knocked up. Ask CJ & Andrea, or my friends Abbey & Jon from college. When they were pregnant with their first child, I would always refer to them as being knocked up (they were married, don't worry) and it was hilarious. But this movie, and my stage in life, have got me thinking about abortion.
Now before I proceed, I should say that I think abortion is wrong in pretty much all cases. If it were just a personal choice issue, I would be totally for it - as I do think a woman has the right to do what she will with her body. However, it isn't just a personal choice in my mind, it is a life. There is a great scene in the movie where the "Knocked Up One" is talking to her mom and her mom is telling her to just "take care of the situation," and we all know what that means. But she decides what is inside her isn't a situation, it is a life. And at the end of the movie there is a great shot during the credits where the mom is holding the result of that "situation" (aka the baby). And ultimately, for that reason only, I support pro-life laws.
But this post isn't really about that. This post is a little more sympathetic than that. I have been thinking a lot about what I would do if I knocked someone up "accidentally." How would I react? And for the first time ever, I think a male might possibly be the closest to understanding the fear of pregnancy like a woman does. Why? Because I am a minister; now hold on.
If I got someone pregnant, it wouldn't just be a "social faux paux," but it would mean I would most likely lose my job. It means that I would have a seriously hard time finding a new job in my field, and most likely have to completely redefine who I am. Not only that, but the ministry that I work with would have a tarnished image (maybe even significantly public since we are apart of the "media" now), and there would be significant disappointment from all areas of my life. All my "great" plans I have for myself would pretty much instantly go out the window. No book deals. No career in politics. No developing a nationally syndicated talk radio show. Even if I did the "right thing" in the situation, there would be some serious consequences.
Now I am not going to argue on whether or not all the above are fair - what I am going to say is that all the above isn't that far off from what all women have to deal with in an unwanted pregnancy. And it is that fear, and unequal serious consequences, that makes abortion a little more of a "gray" issue (not more "gray" in the sense of the morality, but "gray" in the reaction).
I would hope if I got someone pregnant, I would be man enough to do the right thing - whatever that meant. But I am not 100% sure I wouldn't at least think of suggesting the alternative. It doesn't make it right, in fact, it would be wrong. But I at least get it now. I get it a lot more than I got it when I was in college that's for sure.
Whether it is a porn producer in Atlanta that I have lunch with, or a gay friend, or some women I know that have had abortions, I always, always, always try to get across that they are loved and cherished not only by God, but by me as well. Just as God was still there for David when he knocked up Bathsheba, I would want someone to be there for me - and until that day comes (lets pray not), I want to be there for others. That's a Christ-like response to an unwanted pregnancy that we should all strive for.
Quoted From: Pat [Visitor]What I was referring to is that, as I am sure you would expect, I am not having sex right now - nor am I planning to. But, let's be honest, you never know in a moment of weakness what can happen (as the story of David and Bathsheba is a great example of the best of men succumbing to weakness)
Is there really such thing as an accidental pregnacy?
Quoted From: Pat [Visitor]Exactly.
If you say you accidentally got pregnant does that mean you accidentally had sex?
Quoted From: Pat [Visitor]I would totally agree with that. And I am not saying I want to create and excuse for poor decisions. All I am really trying to say is that I understand a little bit more than I used to the fear associated with a "mistake" (maybe that's a better word) pregnancy.
I believe the problem is lack of responsiblity in our culture.
Quoted From: Sarah Elwer [Visitor]Ok, thank you Dr. Kay Smith. Sheesh! I am not using moment in the literal term. We have "moments" of our life that are weaker than others, or "moments" of our marriage that aren't as good as the others. Man, what is with everyone being so literal today. I am just going to start putting quotes around everything I do.
Putting it as a "moment" of weakness means that we had only a moment of weakness. The roof top counts as that for sure - but the going and getting her and all that doesn't count as a "moment" anymore.
Quoted From: Sarah Elwer [Visitor]You are not being selfish, you are being smart: because you are a newly wed and you want to make the right decisions.
But, is it selfish? Am I being selfish to be thinking about "my plans" when there is a new life and blessing from the Lord involved in the situation? I don't know...
Quoted From: Sarah Elwer [Visitor]How were you a B.S. major and you don't know who Kay Smith was...She was only the Biblical Studies department chair.
Who's Kay SMith? Should I be upset you called me by her name?
Quoted From: sectim42:
Just as God was still there for David when he knocked up Bathsheba,
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